Ad: period tracking app

I don’t know about you all, but every day I wake up and think, menstruation is a beautiful thing.

First off, it keeps my mental math sharp. Without periods, why would I ever count four weeks backward in my head while I sit on the toilet? 

I love the uncertainty of it all. Am I late? Am I early? Can I risk wearing white pants? If I didn’t get a period, I would only ask myself these questions on my way to work the Tuesday after Labor Day.  

Number three, it makes wearing a swimsuit more exciting. I used to only worry about nip slips, but now I can also check to see if my tampon string is hanging out. Fun! 

Number four–

Okay, *looks around* it’s safe. I think the non-menstruating folks quit reading a while ago. Let’s get into it.  

It’s hard enough being a woman these days. Periods shouldn’t make it worse. 

Hi there, we’re Clue**, and we’re here to take the guesswork out of your cycle. 

With our app, you can:

• Easily track your period’s start and end dates. Say goodbye to mental math and stained undies! 

• Happily monitor your moods. No more blaming yourself for crying when you’re at the most vulnerable part of your cycle. 

• See your cycle’s trends over time. Use data to understand what’s happening down there and eliminate surprises. 

Periods might not be everyone’s favorite part of being female. But Clue is here to help you through all 28 days, over and over again.  

Sign up now to take back control of your cycle.

**Clue is a real app; this writing is a fake ad (but could be a real one)